Monday, May 31, 2010

Thinking....

Happy Memorial Day everyone. I hope you are all remembering who we celebrate today.

Charlie is at the park playing softball. Lake is at the park playing. Lady Lennon and I are hanging out at the house, enjoying each other. I started to get a little annoyed at the fact that I am "doing nothing" today like everyone else. Then, I remembered, I am doing something. I am spending time with Lennon. I thought about just a month ago, she was in the hospital fighting for her life and today is she is getting fat! I say that as if it's a good thing because she needed to gain weight! Trust me, she found her appetite and likes it! It really cracks me up how much she is eating these days because just a week ago I was throwing childish tantrums because she wouldn't eat. Now, she is getting chunky and eating like a little pig.... and I love every bit of it!

She is starting to smile a little, when I pick her up. She will be fussing and when I go to pick her up I see a little smirk and I cannot help but laugh. She knows she is rotten.

I am already planning her first birthday party!! I cannot wait. It is going to be so much fun. I debated on telling the theme because I don't want anyone to steal it... but then again, I will just have to crash the party that steals my theme. I do mean CRASH... as in, "Girls Just Want to Have Fun" style.

The theme is going to be an Alice In Wonderland Tea Party. I am hoping to convince Charlie to dress as the Mad Hatter and one of my sisters to dress as The Queen of Hearts. I want to find Lennon a tiny Alice dress. How cute would that be? I want to invite girls only. I have all the details finalized, I just have to put them on paper so I don't forget. I just think, after all she has been through, she deserves the coolest birthday party ever! Even if she has no clue of what is going on!

I was so scared to have a daughter. I mean, petrified! I was scared she was going to end up like me. I know I was a terrible teenager. I know I drove my mom crazy, and I know I was extremely rebellious. Heck, rebellion is my middle name. I was told by one of the nurses in the NICU, who has a Down Syndrome 16 year old daughter, that her daughter doesn't have the natural desire to be rebellious. She said she wishes all her kids were like her. That blessed me more than she will ever know! I will have a teenage daughter that will be sweet as pie! I also hope all you other moms will be highly jealous of my angel teenage daughter! Just kidding... well, sort of. Hopefully she will rub off on Lake!

Speaking of rebellion.... (stepping onto soapbox) I still do not like to be told what to do. I hate when people say, "You need to...." Nothing gets under my skin and will push me away quicker than that. I don't know what it is... but it grates on my nerves. If people would just realize that I am an adult and I will do what I please, when I please, and how I please, life would be so much simpler. If people would just agree to disagree with the way I choose to do things, there would be less tension and arguments. Especially when it comes to raising my children. I know I sound like a jerk but it was just on my mind and I wanted to put it out there. Try to make your point without telling me what I need to do.... make it out like it's my idea. Maybe then, I will hear your idea. And, if I don't like your idea, get over it. I wonder how I got to be this way? I wonder if it has something to do with my raising? (Ok, I am off my soapbox now.)

We are finally getting Lake's swing set put up. We (as in Charlie) had started it around his birthday, and then I had Lennon, so things got a little behind. I was thinking today how much fun he is going to have, and when Lennon gets big how much fun THEY are going to have together. I am so glad he will have a sibling. It makes me excited for when she has a little sibling. I know there will be days they want to punch each other, but overall, there is just something about a sibling. Especially around the holidays and when you start having kids. I just love my little neice like she is my own. I could literally steal her and keep her for myself. I don't see her nearly enough these days... Ugh, I cannot wait to be off quarantine with Lennon! I hope she and Nora Kate are best friends like her momma and I are. I know this is dumb, but as soon as I typed that last sentence, I started crying. It will break my heart if Nora doesn't want her around because she is embarrassed of her or because she has to "look after" her too much when they are together. I know I shouldn't think like that, but I cannot help it.

Anyways... I am off to register for the HGTV Green Home Giveaway. Please God, let me win!